Dear Friends,
I have been writing lately. Sometimes at night, after coming home from a drink with a friend. When the buzz is wearing off and my fingers are itching to get that dialogue exchange I kept replaying in my head on the train onto a page. In the mornings, I find myself waking up with ideas. Edits. Blurbs of description. Something to add. And instead of rotting in my bed scrolling, I arise!! I march straight to the computer!! To write!!
This is monumental for me. The whole reason I started this newsletter is because, in 2020, I was having a difficult time writing on my own. I needed a space to share my thoughts about writing. And my thoughts about not writing. Unpacking why it feels so hard, and promising myself (and you) that I would try to be better at doing the thing that I claim to love so much.
And now I’m like actually doing it. I’m writing. FOR FUN. But also because what else am I going to do? I’m writing because this is what I’m supposed to be doing, and that’s the only thing I’ve ever really known to be true.
I don’t really know what made it click. Or when really. Maybe I’m still riding the New Year, New Me wave. Maybe it’s because I deleted all my social media apps from my phone. Maybe it’s because someone told me I should light a candle before I start writing to set the mood and I did it, and it actually worked. (Thanks, Shania!)
I’ve also found that having conversations about writing actually makes me want to do it more. Especially when the conversations are about the tactical act of writing. I love asking other writers questions like, What time of day do you write? Do you outline the story first, or do you just dive in? How do you separate yourself from your characters? Getting into the nitty gritty of it all really strips away the facade that writing is this very Difficult and Serious practice.
Speaking of seriousness, I also wonder if I’ve started enjoying writing recently because I’ve allowed myself to be funny again. I’ve always considered myself a comedy writer to some extent. Even my collection of essays, which were incredibly earnest in nature had a comedic bent. I went through a period last year, though, where everything I wrote felt very uncharacteristically intense. I guess that really speaks to what I was going through, mentally and emotionally, at the time. But recently, I’ve had to remind myself that I like writing more when I’m able to strike a balance between the traumatic and the humorous. “Nuance” is one of my favorite words. It’s been a guiding concept for me for several years now, in how I navigate life in general. And I love when I can bring it into my writing practice.
All that being said, I just wanted to share this newfound enjoyment of the writing process here as a little praise report. And also as a reminder that writing can be fun. When it feels right. When it flows. When you’re in the right headspace. For so long writing was none of those things for me. I’m grateful for that time. I feel like it was necessary to get me to where I am now. And I hope I can just ride the wave of this energy until I get to where I want to be.
Before I go…
My friend, Bre, just launched her newsletter, Bre’s Breakdown, which has already proven itself to be a must-subscribe. If this newsletter is anything like the belly-laugh inducing conversations I’ve had with Bre about pop culture, music, career and everything in between, then you’re in for a treat.
i loved reading this!
I’m currently struggling to get back into writing after years of not creating anything -- so this is nice to hear! Thank you!